Three Day Weekend Re-Cap

in a nutshell (not because i'm busy, i just don't feel like writing):

• called out sick on friday. spent most of the morning in a post-NyQuil fog from the night before and the rest of the day playing Zelda: Twilight Princess. the more i play this game the more i love it; just when i think i'm near the end, another quest pops up! totally stellar!
• saturday we bought a couch after having been on the receiving end of an intervention by Justin and John. it's big and comfy and red and has a recliner on each end. i'll be honest, it wasn't my 1st choice, but was definitely my 2nd. later that evening was supposed to be spent at a birthday party for a friend-of-a-friend, out in NJ but was spent watching My So Called Life on DVD, instead.
• finished shopping for my do-it-yourself Halloween costume, for our party and started researching Halloween party food ideas; i'm thinking that the menu will be fairly simple: 6' hero sandwich/giant bagel sandwich, assorted chips and snacky foods with some fabulous dips and tapanades, punch, and then desserts; graveyard trifle, "mud cups", and other halloween desserts. in the past i've found that hot horse devours whores ovaries canapes just keep the host(s) running back and forth to the kitchen, thereby making it nearly impossible to enjoy their own party. it's all shaping up quite nicely and i'm sure it's gonna be alot of fun.

wow...look at that...i actually wrote more than i wanted...

the Absolute Best News I've Heard All Week

read it here folks.

a Brief Note to My Co-Worker (More of a Vitriolic Post-It, Really)

thanks a million, you disgusting snot sputtering, coughing, moaning germ bazaar, for not calling out sick! you've sneezed and hacked the last 2 days; you've sat there sucking your thumb like a toddler and then handed me papers and folders and things, and now i've got your cold.

this zycam shit better work.

"there's nothing more inconvenient than an old queen with a head cold"~ Robert Preston (Victor/Victoria)

an Absolutely Fabulous Gift

this little beauty was waiting for me when i got home yesterday from work. a gift from stephen, for our one year anniversary, which he apparently could not wait for me to open. i cannot begin to tell you how happy it made me to open, as i've been looking for an AbFab box set for ages which has Absolutely Everything, and this one does; every season plus 2 Christmas Specials, the Mirror Ball pilot and tons of other stuff. i really could not have hoped for a more wonderful surprise!

thanks, babycakes!

"You can never have enough hats, gloves or shoes"~ Patsy Stone

Test Day: Wild Bore

You Are 36% Interesting

Truth be told, you're not the most interesting person in the world. You don't put much effort into expanding your horizons. You're content to stay in your little comfort zone. You tend to get stuck in a rut, and you often bore people who spend time with you. You are predictable and somewhat narcissistic. You're too focused on yourself to see how boring you can be. You have the potential to be an incredibly fascinating person. You just have to be a little more proactive. Shake things up. Try something new. Take a risk. The worst that can happen is that you'll have an amazing story to tell!

Are You Boring or Interesting?

Aw Nuts

so my Rice Krispie Treat post prompted an e-mail "discussion" about food phobias with a regular reader of my humble blog*. ok well not phobia per se, more like "childhood-borne food aversions", like my own, to Nutella:

once upon a time i attended to St Frances Cabrini elementary school, in beautifully urban Bensonhurst, Brooklyn. the most interesting about SFC was its complete lack of ethnic diversity; almost every kid in my class, from K to 8, had a last name ending in a vowel, which was really not surprising since the neighborhood/parish was 99% Italian. anyway, one of the little girls i attended school with was 1st generation Italian American(her parents were "off the boat" we used to say) and her brownbag lunches would dully reflect her ethnicity: salami and provolone, fresh mozzarella and red peppers, mortadella, or tuna in olive oil and lemon, always on italian bread. another particular favorite of hers was an inch thick schmear of Nutella on italian bread.

well, one day, apparently she was not feeling up to the task of devouring a choco-hazelnut sandwich and grew quite ill. projectile-y ill. ill enough to to cover half the cafetorium in half digested Nutella and italian bread. needless to say, it was disgusting enough to put me off Nutella since 1982, much to stephen's dismay**.

so what's your food aversion, and from whence does it spring?

*he's got quite a justified dislike of Rice Krispie Treats, lemme tell ya.
**he's been dying to try nutella for years and i won't allow a jar in the house.

Treat Yourself

CG: i never had a Rice Krispie Treat till, like 2 weeks ago, when Stephen's sister made them. they're really good!
Co-Worker Girl: i tried making them, but they're really hard.
CawfeeGuy: really though? what do you mean "hard"?
CWG: it was just really hard mixing them and spreading them into the pan; it took me a really long time.
CG: i've never made them, but i'm pretty sure one armed, retarded, girl scouts make them
CWG: oh no! you have to be really strong to spread them out....and then to try and cut them?? omg. you have no idea! i almost broke a knife!
CG (after googling the recipe): did you put enough butter?
CWG: **rolls eyes*** there's no butter.

PS: the entire process takes 15 minutes, start to finish. and yes, virginia, there is butter in the recipe.

When Worlds Collide

I…WE…cleaned THE ENTIRE HOUSE on Saturday. We had our parents (and 4 of my favorite Special Guest Gays) over for stephen’s b-day, Saturday night.

now, the place is SPOTLESS. I mean PRISTINE. Not a BIT of clutter, ANYWHERE; It’s very unnerving. I feel SO much pressure to KEEP it that way, ESPECIALLY if we…I…am gonna throw a (costumes optional, masks required) Halloween party.

saturday night's get together was strangely amazing. nothing's more disconcerting that having your parents chat up your friends and both parties telling you, later, how much they enjoyed the other.

highlight of the evening: working the expression "cumpig" into a side conversation with one of my friends, and finding out that all the gays heard it and none of the parents. talk about "the cocktail party effect".

"It was a good time for sure. I didn't get mentioned by name in your blog though, so I'm very sad. "~ Justin

Brother Can You Spare a Dime?

wow.
Lehman Brothers is gone.
Merrill Lynch is being bought out by Banc of America.
Morgan Stanley sounds like they're next.

this is a terribly "deja vu" situation.

Irony: Not Just the Opposite of Wrinkly

Older Staten Island Guy Co-Worker: are you sure you don't want a zeppole (from the san gennaro feast)?
CawfeeGuy: um...yeah...thanks though.
OSIGCW: what about a fried oreo?
CG: a what..?
OSIGCW: deep fried oreo...they're really good.
CG: um...thanks but no. i'm pretty sure i won't be able to find the point value for that.
OSIGCW: c'mon!
CG: hey, weren't you telling me that you had major heart problems, like 2 years ago?
OSIGCW: yeah, i had 4 arteries replaced.
CG: oh.

Test Day: It's A Bird. It's a Plane. It's a Superlative.

You Would Be Voted Biggest Nerd

When you were in school, you did your thing so much that you were an outsider. You didn't follow trends, kiss up to popular people, or try to fit in. And while it may have been tough for you to survive, you came out stronger for it. Being independent might not help you much in school, but it helps you a ton in the real world!

What Superlative Are You?

9/11: My Opinion

unlike the last several years, today feels no different than any other thursday, and you don't know how grateful i am.

my co-workers and i had a blessedly brief chat about the weather on that day, but that was it. there was no moment of silence. there's nobody wearing ribbons. there were no e-mails or memos about memorial services or "remembering the day". there was nobody selling flags or buttons in the subway or outside out building.

it made a nice change not to be forced to remember or reminded to mourn. i'm sick of the mourning. i'm sick of people beating their breasts and wailing like an italian widow. i'm sick of tv specials and "the fate of ground zero". i'm sick of that one video shot of the flaming, smoking towers, that they always show, over and over and over again. i'm sick of hearing from/about the families of the victims.

have your own memorials. have your own monuments. have your own vigils. mourn and grieve in your own home, but it's been seven years, people; the wounds ain't gonna heal if you keep picking at them.

Blech.

“This must be Thursday. I never could get the hang of Thursdays.”~ Douglas Adams

the Best Eavesdropping Story. Ever

check it out here, kids.
bravo, Byron, for your fabulous transcription skills.

Because Somebody (Who Regularly Comments On My Blog) Thinks I'm a Bit Negative...

Gosh, Leave Him Alone With the Kid for Half an Hour and Look What Happens...

So I'm Thinkin...

it's time for the huz and i to throw a party.
the weather's still gorgeously tolerable and the house is clean (lord only knows how long either phenomenon will last). I can think of two possibilities:

1) generically fabulous un-themed house party: lots of people, lots of food, lots of booze, lots of music, lots of laughs.
2) a Halloween costume party: (see #1, add masks).

either one will give me an opportunity to bust out the fondue fountain...

So...what do we think?

Bacchanal or Costume-a-palooza?

Everything's Coming Up Roses...For Now Pt. 2

at what point do you continue to count your blessings and not sit at the edge of your seat, waiting for the dam of good tidings to burst and bring forth misery? i'm happy and content and relaxed and enjoying my job/life; this does not make for fun, witty, clever blog posts...

Test Day: "I'm a Pretty Girl Mama"!

You Are the Daughter

You very keyed in to emotions. You care deeply and are quick to forgive others. You often get lost in your own thoughts and daydreams. You find it difficult to stay focused. At your best, you are sweet, sensitive, and innocent. You bring joy to people's lives. You are open and expressive. You love sharing your optimistic, dreamy vision of the world. At your worst, you feel powerless and like a victim. Your fear can paralyze you. You tend to complain and whine. Whether your complaints are legitimate or not, you're not one to solve your own problems.

What Family Role Do You Play?

Just Fondue It

Don't ask me why, but a few years ago Stephen and i received a fondue fountain from my brother and his wife, for christmas. again: i have no idea why; we'd never expressed even the slightest interest in owning one, especially not to them (whom we see so infrequently due to our mutual dislike for each other). anyway, after using it once with a bunch of friends, we decided that chocolate fondue is fun...for about 10 minutes; how much chocolate covered _____ can one eat?

according to the "cookbook" which came with it, you can also make a cheese fondue fountain, which offers even fewer possibilities for variety and a higher chance you'll die of a heart attack after prolonged exposure.

now, don't get me wrong, i love cheese and i love chocolate. i do. it's almost criminal how much i adore cheese (think: Goldiemouse and the Three Cats), it's just that with this whole Weight Watchers thing, the thought of dipping hunks of bread in a waterfall of hot cheese and then eating it is both strangely attractive and repellent, all at the same time (think: Jeff Goldblum). ditto the chocolate fountain; as much as i love chocolate covered strawberries, bananas, marshmallows and pretzels (what else can you dip in chocolate, btw?), more than a couple of pieces seems ridiculously excessive.

during last week's cleaning-binge, we found the fountain buried in the back of a closet next to the weed whacker and a huge box of vhs movies, which prompted stephen to wonder if perhaps we should set it up next week when our parents come over for his birthday. i'll admit, i was very tempted by the idea, but then i thought of having to clean it afterward and how much chocolate we'd wasted after 10 minutes of dipping various fruits, not to mention how many points chocolate and fruit are, and it seemed like less of a good idea; a clear waste of money and very unhealthy for all of us. maybe, next time we have a big party (10 + people, or maybe just MS and N'il), but not when it's just our parents.

besides, i don't think there will be room for it on the credenza with the life sized bust of stephen i'm having carved out of cheese...

Y'Gotta Get a Gimmick*

*this is probably the most un-PC post in the history of my blog, but i feel compelled to write it. i apologize in advance to anyone i may will offend.

i've been noticing the homeless alot more lately; not that it's difficult, mind you, when 95% of the homeless i encounter seem to be auditioning for America's Indigents Got Talent. every down-and-outter i see (on my way to, or home from, work) has either a song they're singing (Friday's Karaoke Guy, outside of Macy's), an instrument they're playing (the F train's Saxophone Guy and Little Mexican Man with his Guitar), a dance they wanna share (the 34th Street/Broadway Breakdancing Alliance) or a role they're playing ("I'm homeless, hungry and broke; i've been looking for work since 7am..."). Not even a dyed in the wool new yorker can pretend nothing's happening when (Lying in the Gutter but Looking at the ) Star Search is being performed 3 feet away in an enclosed space...but don't think i haven't tried...

see, the other thing i've noticed is that the singers, dancers, orators and musicians do much better than the guy with a coffee cup and a cardboard sign ("will leave you alone for spare change"). i guess it really is just me, but other New Yorkers are willing to part with their hard earned pennies and nickles in exchange for some low-level entertainment and a feeling of "giving back". the more i hear, the less i wanna give; i just wanna be left alone during my commute. i have an iPod thankyouverymuch; don't wanna hear "Nature Boy" on the sax, or "Blinky the One-Eyed Paraplegic sings the Billie Holliday Song book" and No, Paco, i do not want to buy your cd. maybe i'm a hard-hearted bastard or a cold hearted snake, but combining dinner theater and strap hanging is not a good idea. i only open my pocket to "legit" entertainment: fabulous pre-op trannies lip synching Kylie Minogue tunes, without knowing the words.

Re: Three Day Weekend To-Do List

1. Passport
2. Tattoo
3. Massive amounts of Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess
4. Red Velvet cupcakes with cream cheese frosting, from scratch


a good time was had by all!