CawfeeGuy's Latest Black Hole of Time Suckage (or Somebody Needs a Creative Outlet)

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Musical Mondays

When the earth was still flat,
And the clouds made of fire,
And mountains stretched up to the sky,
Sometimes higher,
Folks roamed the earth
Like big rolling kegs.
They had two sets of arms.
They had two sets of legs.
They had two faces peering
Out of one giant head
So they could watch all around them
As they talked; while they read.
And they never knew nothing of love.
It was before the origin of love.

The origin of love

And there were three sexes then,
One that looked like two men
Glued up back to back,
Called the children of the sun.
And similar in shape and girth
Were the children of the earth.
They looked like two girls
Rolled up in one.
And the children of the moon
Were like a fork shoved on a spoon.
They were part sun, part earth
Part daughter, part son.

The origin of love

Now the gods grew quite scared
Of our strength and defiance
And Thor said,
"I'm gonna kill them all
With my hammer,
Like I killed the giants."
And Zeus said, "No,
You better let me
Use my lightening, like scissors,
Like I cut the legs off the whales
And dinosaurs into lizards."
Then he grabbed up some bolts
And he let out a laugh,
Said, "I'll split them right down the middle.
Gonna cut them right up in half."
And then storm clouds gathered above
Into great balls of fire

And then fire shot down
From the sky in bolts
Like shining blades
Of a knife.
And it ripped
Right through the flesh
Of the children of the sun
And the moon
And the earth.
And some Indian god
Sewed the wound up into a hole,
Pulled it round to our belly
To remind us of the price we pay.
And Osiris and the gods of the Nile
Gathered up a big storm
To blow a hurricane,
To scatter us away,
In a flood of wind and rain,
And a sea of tidal waves,
To wash us all away,
And if we don't behave
They'll cut us down again
And we'll be hopping round on one foot
And looking through one eye.

Last time I saw you
We had just split in two.
You were looking at me.
I was looking at you.
You had a way so familiar,
But I could not recognize,
Cause you had blood on your face;
I had blood in my eyes.
But I could swear by your expression
That the pain down in your soul
Was the same as the one down in mine.
That's the pain,
Cuts a straight line
Down through the heart;
We called it love.
So we wrapped our arms around each other,
Trying to shove ourselves back together.
We were making love,
Making love.
It was a cold dark evening,
Such a long time ago,
When by the mighty hand of Jove,
It was the sad story
How we became
Lonely two-legged creatures,
It's the story of
The origin of love.
That's the origin of love

~"the Origin of Love" (Hedwig and the Angry Inch)

God Bless You Cinnamon Jenkins Pt 2: Work My Broadway/Literary Pussy

so.
very.
excited.

can't.
form.
coherent
thought.

Wicked Hangover

we finally saw Wicked last night, thanks to a very generous Christmas gift from mom, and all i can say is wow. really, that's all i can say, but only because i'm so fucking tired i can hardly type.
knowing we'd be out till well past midnight, i took off today; sadly that was not to be. Dum-Dum's mother passed away yesterday and in a delirious moment of sympathy i told Cunty i'd come in rather than leave the department short. 12 hours later, at 2:30 am, when we finally got home (8 pm show + subway problems + dinner in Chelsea + a ferry ride), i was severely regretting my decision. now, i'm regretting it even more as i try and pry my eye lids open with toothpicks and coffee...

"Whoa"!

Joey Lawrence is in Chicago on Broadway. does nobody remember Blossom? how in the name of Cher is this possible? he does look kinda hot though...in a washed up 80's has-been kinda way..."Long as you keep 'em way off balance/How can they spot you got no talents?/Razzle dazzle 'em/And they'll never catch wise!"~Razzle Dazzle (Chicago)

Happy Accidents

sometimes things work out for the best, even when (at the time) they feel like a total kick in the nuts. take this weekend, for instance...

through a comedy of errors, the plans to spend the weekend with MS and Nil fell through. don't ask how, Mr Nosy; suffice to say that they didn't happen, but they will commence this weekend. sadly, this left Stephen and i on the NJ Turnpike with a loaf of homemade bread, a Mixed-Berry-Cheesecake Trifle and some Weight Watchers friendly roadtrip snacks. enroute to the old homestead, we stopped at my new favorite store, Target where i found the most fabulous Aquaman t-shirt and some newer smaller work pants to match my newer, smaller ass. we also picked up the coolest microwave corn popper, so now i don't have to worry about not having brown paper lunch bags in the house. when we finally got home, it was still early enough to put up 4 loads of laundry and go grocery shopping. needless to say, i went to bed feeling like i accomplished more in that one day than i have in weeks.

sunday we went to my mom's and hung out with the family. Frangelica and Squirt were there, and we learned that Franki is partial to showtunes (the only time she stopped crying is when my mom was singing South Pacific). aside from that, for once it was a fairly peaceful dinner. we all just hung out and bullshitted with the minimum of drama. rather than waste the Trifle (read: sit at home in the dark with the bowl and two spoons), we brought it to mom's where it was devoured by all those in attendance. i'm glad we brought it, it gave me some ideas for this weekend; how to re-make it: bigger and better!

even more exciting: i finally fit back into my size 34 jeans! this WW thing really works! who knew?

You're Timeless to Me

well somebody fetch me a cookie!
i was right! Stephen's surprise was 2 tickets to see Hairspray with dinner afterward, and a hotel room in the city so we didn't have to schlep all the way back to Staten Island (the ferry runs once an hour on the weekends, and we always seem to miss it on the way home, early Sunday/late Saturday).

now i'm sure all you Yogurt Fags (ie: fruity bottom and brimming with culture) have already seen Hairspray, but for everyone else who gets to Broadway as often as i do (once a year, if i'm lucky) lemme tell you: this was such an awesome show! as much as i enjoyed Rent, the revival of Into the Woods, Naked Boys Singing and Chicago, they're all a bit...dark/downers; with depressing themes, sinister characters and some depressing (albeit wonderfully written) songs. i'll readily admit that i got choked up at all one point or another during all of them (yes, even during Naked Boys Singing).

a friend of mine had loaned me the Original Cast Recording a couple of years ago, and i thought it was really good; Snappy, plucky and peppy (y'know how i love my Harvey Fierstein). i wasn't prepared for how fantastic it would be to see it in living color. it was light, sweet and sunny; like a big glass of Tang spiked with vodka. plus, veteran Darlene Love was in the cast, playing Motormouth Mabel! she and the rest of the phenomonal cast (which included Tevin Campbell and that guy who played Kirk on the 80's sitcom Dear John), totally brought down the house! we left feeling so happy and elated that we practically floated to dinner!

it was a truly fantastic weekend; we had such a great time at dinner and the hotel. he did such a fantastic and romantic job, it's really no wonder that i fell so hard for him.

"And so i'm gonna shake and shimmy it /With all my might today'/Cause you cant stop /The motion of the ocean /Or the rain from above /They can try to stop the paradise/We're dreaming of /But they cannot stop the rhythm /Of two hearts in love to stay /'Cause you cant stop the beat"!~ You Can't Stop the Beat (Hairspray: Original Broadway Cast)