"Get 'Em at Gimbel's"~ Auntie Mame

the place: Sears, the Staten Island Mall
the time: around 1pm, Sunday after a late night of Chocolate Martinis from Bay Ridge straight bars (which is another story, to be sure)

CawfeeGuy (to a sixty-plus frail woman bearing a striking resmblence to Juno from Beetlejuice): excuse me, do you work in the men's section?
Juno: yes?
CG: great! i'm looking for a pair of khakis, in navy, flat front, in size 34 x 34.
J: there's nobody on the floor.
CG:..only you...?
J: did you look in the section?
CG: yes...this place looks like it was hit by a hurricane; your customers have teared the section to shreds.
J: oh. you need to find someone on the floor.
CG: you are on the floor; can you help me find them?
J: oh...i'm not on the floor; i'm on register.
CG: noooooooo. you're standing here, on the floor, talking to me; there are no other sales people in this godforsaken place.
J: ...and you looked in the section?
CG: Fuck this; i'm going to Macy's! at least there i know not to expect any help.