"Bored now"~ Evil Willow (Buffy the Vampire Slayer)
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Viva La Bose
About 2 years ago, in a moment of pure unbridled selfishness, i bought myself the (at the time) new Bose in-ear headphones. i can't tell you how much i love these things; the sound quality is absolutely unsurpassed.
above all, though, Bose's customer service is absolutely amazing. When i lost the ear tips, i went on-line and bought 3 pairs; a month later Bose came out with redesigned tips and sent me three new pairs, gratis!
a year after i purchased them, the piece that connects the wire to the plug broke; it had been happening slowly over the course of the year and eventually the headphones no longer played in stereo. i called Bose, explained the situation, and had a new set in less than a week. fabulous thing, the 1 year manufacturer's warranty, no?
A year later (read: 3 weeks ago), i noticed the same thing was happening again. So, i called Bose, explained to the sweet Boston-accented fella the deal and he was totally excited to tell me that they would send me the new Bose headphone, with the upgraded plug!
they came yesterday and i can't be more delighted with them. Bose has a lifetime customer in me.
above all, though, Bose's customer service is absolutely amazing. When i lost the ear tips, i went on-line and bought 3 pairs; a month later Bose came out with redesigned tips and sent me three new pairs, gratis!
a year after i purchased them, the piece that connects the wire to the plug broke; it had been happening slowly over the course of the year and eventually the headphones no longer played in stereo. i called Bose, explained the situation, and had a new set in less than a week. fabulous thing, the 1 year manufacturer's warranty, no?
A year later (read: 3 weeks ago), i noticed the same thing was happening again. So, i called Bose, explained to the sweet Boston-accented fella the deal and he was totally excited to tell me that they would send me the new Bose headphone, with the upgraded plug!
they came yesterday and i can't be more delighted with them. Bose has a lifetime customer in me.
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
Tuesday Morning WTF
i've tried to look it up (admittedly with little dedication), but can anybody explain to me what the point of this game could possibly be? anyone? (points for originality).
Monday, December 29, 2008
Fit to be Tied Pt 1
Wii Fit. I'll be honest, i never thought i'd see one of those bathroom scale sized...things...in my home. Sure Stephen thought it looked really cool (from the perspective of a Physical Therapist and occasional Wii fan) and was very excited about the "possibilities" available for more interactive games (surfing and snowboarding being his fantasy games of choice), but i thought i was safe when all the murmurs i've heard about it, over the last year, were that it was sold out everywhere. Then came Christmas morning.
a suspiciously large and reasonably heavy rectangular box lay under the tree in brightly colored striped foil paper. the tag said it was from "Rufus Claus" (or "Santa Paws", i can't remember). my 1st thought was that it was the Mac Book Pro i'd asked Santa for and part of me was nervous. i'd put it on my Amazon wishlist as a lark, after being pressured by he and my mom. did he really spend that much on me for Christmas!?! where did the money come from?!? has he been selling his homemade olive or spinach breads on the side of the highway? i ripped the paper with trepidation and gleeful abandon (i'm a very complex person) to reveal...the dreaded Wii Fit. i was both let down, relieved and frightened, all at the same time...
later that night, after a day spent with my in-laws, i returned from my evenings ablutions to find Stephen sitting on the couch smirking, the coffee table pushed to one side and the Wii Fit Platform sitting menacingly in the middle of the rug. "G'head...give it a go", he said, with more than a touch of glee. so i did. Up popped my fabulously accurate Mii, now dressed in strangely unflattering white running pants; We both listened and nodded as the now anthropomophosized Wii Fit Platform lectured us on proper posture. then came the tests.
the 1st test was the weight/BMI. i was relieved and horrified as the BMI Thermometer inched up to "Overweight" making my once cartoonishly box shaped Mii into a terribly more accurate pot-bellied one. the relief is only over the fact that i was not "obese". small victories, folks. i'll spare you the minutiae of the rest of the tests, but will wind up telling you that according to the vicious, hateful, soulless robot now living under my roof my "Wii Age" is 48. Forty-fucking-Eight. I'm 32 folks! very upsetting. naturally stephen was laughing maniacally during the entire affair. i then was forced to choose from the two poorly postured androgynous mannequin/trainers...choosing the male for no other reason than that i couldn't bear the idea of sweating with a woman.
two days later (saturday) after i'd nursed my bruised ego (Friday's antics with Jenn and Bri-the-Pie Guy's fabulous sister definitely helped) and discussed my various exercise options with stephen*, i started my 1st official day of Wii Fitness with a lecture by the Wii Fit for missing a day, followed by 30 minutes of yoga with my new "trainer" whom i'm naming Aryan Aaron since he has the plastic, cornfed, twink look i come to associate with men from the midwest with heavy mormon leanings and biblical names. I can tell right away that AA and i will not be friends. He's way too excited about my ability to maintain the Lightning Bolt in the middle of the Sun Salutation and way too Droopy Dog when i fall over during the Tree pose.
An interesting facet of the Wii Fit is that the more time you spend, the more exercises you unlock, so I'm hoping that eventually i'll log enough time with AA to unlock a new trainer who looks like Tom Katt, Bruce Willis or Colton Ford. Hell, i'll even settle for Bob Hoskins...
*my Stephen Approved program will be 20 to 30 minutes of Aerobic/Strength Training, 5 days a week and 20 to 30 minutes of Yoga on weekends. Other balance activities are encouraged since the Wii Fit seems to think i'm spastic and asked if i fall down alot.
a suspiciously large and reasonably heavy rectangular box lay under the tree in brightly colored striped foil paper. the tag said it was from "Rufus Claus" (or "Santa Paws", i can't remember). my 1st thought was that it was the Mac Book Pro i'd asked Santa for and part of me was nervous. i'd put it on my Amazon wishlist as a lark, after being pressured by he and my mom. did he really spend that much on me for Christmas!?! where did the money come from?!? has he been selling his homemade olive or spinach breads on the side of the highway? i ripped the paper with trepidation and gleeful abandon (i'm a very complex person) to reveal...the dreaded Wii Fit. i was both let down, relieved and frightened, all at the same time...
later that night, after a day spent with my in-laws, i returned from my evenings ablutions to find Stephen sitting on the couch smirking, the coffee table pushed to one side and the Wii Fit Platform sitting menacingly in the middle of the rug. "G'head...give it a go", he said, with more than a touch of glee. so i did. Up popped my fabulously accurate Mii, now dressed in strangely unflattering white running pants; We both listened and nodded as the now anthropomophosized Wii Fit Platform lectured us on proper posture. then came the tests.
the 1st test was the weight/BMI. i was relieved and horrified as the BMI Thermometer inched up to "Overweight" making my once cartoonishly box shaped Mii into a terribly more accurate pot-bellied one. the relief is only over the fact that i was not "obese". small victories, folks. i'll spare you the minutiae of the rest of the tests, but will wind up telling you that according to the vicious, hateful, soulless robot now living under my roof my "Wii Age" is 48. Forty-fucking-Eight. I'm 32 folks! very upsetting. naturally stephen was laughing maniacally during the entire affair. i then was forced to choose from the two poorly postured androgynous mannequin/trainers...choosing the male for no other reason than that i couldn't bear the idea of sweating with a woman.
two days later (saturday) after i'd nursed my bruised ego (Friday's antics with Jenn and Bri-the-Pie Guy's fabulous sister definitely helped) and discussed my various exercise options with stephen*, i started my 1st official day of Wii Fitness with a lecture by the Wii Fit for missing a day, followed by 30 minutes of yoga with my new "trainer" whom i'm naming Aryan Aaron since he has the plastic, cornfed, twink look i come to associate with men from the midwest with heavy mormon leanings and biblical names. I can tell right away that AA and i will not be friends. He's way too excited about my ability to maintain the Lightning Bolt in the middle of the Sun Salutation and way too Droopy Dog when i fall over during the Tree pose.
An interesting facet of the Wii Fit is that the more time you spend, the more exercises you unlock, so I'm hoping that eventually i'll log enough time with AA to unlock a new trainer who looks like Tom Katt, Bruce Willis or Colton Ford. Hell, i'll even settle for Bob Hoskins...
*my Stephen Approved program will be 20 to 30 minutes of Aerobic/Strength Training, 5 days a week and 20 to 30 minutes of Yoga on weekends. Other balance activities are encouraged since the Wii Fit seems to think i'm spastic and asked if i fall down alot.
Post Christmas Monday
*yawn*
*stretch*
does anybody really wanna be back to work today?
yeah i didn't think so.
rumor has it, hardly anybody is working this week; whatev.
christmas means family and family means drama and drama means next year i have no desire to be with my family for christmas. i'm thinking Disney, the huz is thinking B & B. as long as it ain't near my kin, i don't care.
Friday thru Sunday however we spent with some of my preferred family, the Pie-Guy family on Friday and Team Magenta Sequins on Saturday and Sunday. We brought the Wii Fit we got from Santa Paws to both get togethers and the reactions were as hysterical as they were different. the highlights: English Girls hula-hooping till they turn purple, Bears running through celeb populated parks ("what's George Michael doing here"??), Fag Hags on Skis, mental cruelty to nice straight guys, and promises of (possibly nude) real hula hooping.
my own Wii Fit experience is better served in it's own post. for now, though, let me reiterate how much i adore the Pie-Guy family and Team MS. you guys absolutely rock and i cannot tell you how happy i am to know and love you all.
*stretch*
does anybody really wanna be back to work today?
yeah i didn't think so.
rumor has it, hardly anybody is working this week; whatev.
christmas means family and family means drama and drama means next year i have no desire to be with my family for christmas. i'm thinking Disney, the huz is thinking B & B. as long as it ain't near my kin, i don't care.
Friday thru Sunday however we spent with some of my preferred family, the Pie-Guy family on Friday and Team Magenta Sequins on Saturday and Sunday. We brought the Wii Fit we got from Santa Paws to both get togethers and the reactions were as hysterical as they were different. the highlights: English Girls hula-hooping till they turn purple, Bears running through celeb populated parks ("what's George Michael doing here"??), Fag Hags on Skis, mental cruelty to nice straight guys, and promises of (possibly nude) real hula hooping.
my own Wii Fit experience is better served in it's own post. for now, though, let me reiterate how much i adore the Pie-Guy family and Team MS. you guys absolutely rock and i cannot tell you how happy i am to know and love you all.
Friday, December 26, 2008
Test Day: a Family Affair
| You Feel at Peace With Your Family |
 You feel like your family is prone to too many arguments and instability. You never feel like things can be completely peaceful. While your parents made mistakes, you forgive them and accept them for who they are. You tend to be the rock in your family. You support everyone in their times of need, and they take your advice seriously. |
How Do You Really Feel About Your Family?
Wednesday, December 24, 2008
Your Multiple Choice Holiday Greeting
Stephen, Rufus and I wish you and youra) Husband
b) Wife
c) "roommate"
d) Boyfriend
e) Girlfriend
f) Lover(s)
g) slave
h) master
i) other:____________
j) all of the above
and/or your
a) family
b) pet(s)
c) all of the above
a
a) Merryb) Happy
c) Joyous
d) Safe
e) Bright
f) Peaceful
g) all of the above
i) Christmas
ii) Hanukka
iii) Solstice
iv) Kwanza
v) Thursday
vi) all of the above
and a Happy New Year!
i'll be out tomorrow and friday, so have a great weekend, kids!
Attack of the 7" Latte` or Your Christmas Cackle, a Day Early
Picture it: Downtown Brooklyn. a dark, cold and rainy Christmas Eve morning, sometime around 7:15.
a young(ish), handsome(ish) office worker has just come from Starbucks, where he had the nicest chat with the incredibly amiable and flirty little asian girl, behind the counter, and is walking back to his office; Venti-Skim-6 shot-Caramel Latte` in one hand and a Low-Fat Turkey Bacon and cheese breakfast sandwich in the other. He' s looking fierce(ish) in gorgeously ass-hugging jeans and a butch(ish) looking plaid shirt (today is a company approved dress down day) and ski jacket; he's got the Sal Sol Orchestra belting out a disco-christmas medley in his ears and is feeling pretty damn good about life.
Unexpectedy, he hits a patch of black ice and feels himself starting to slip. reflexively, he tightens his grip on his latte, thus causing the inch of foam on top to squirt out of the little sippy hole, all over his face. Suddenly the Sal Soul Orchestra is a bit too loud in his ears, he can't see out of his glasses and the fierce(ish) facade crumbles like a dried out scone. he laments not grabbing his customary handful of napkins and shuffles into the building. the people with whom he shares the elevator pretend not to notice the foam dripping off his ears and chin.
the only upside is that it was only the foam which squirted out and not the actual latte...which would've been a horrible waste of coffee (and seven dollars).
a young(ish), handsome(ish) office worker has just come from Starbucks, where he had the nicest chat with the incredibly amiable and flirty little asian girl, behind the counter, and is walking back to his office; Venti-Skim-6 shot-Caramel Latte` in one hand and a Low-Fat Turkey Bacon and cheese breakfast sandwich in the other. He' s looking fierce(ish) in gorgeously ass-hugging jeans and a butch(ish) looking plaid shirt (today is a company approved dress down day) and ski jacket; he's got the Sal Sol Orchestra belting out a disco-christmas medley in his ears and is feeling pretty damn good about life.
Unexpectedy, he hits a patch of black ice and feels himself starting to slip. reflexively, he tightens his grip on his latte, thus causing the inch of foam on top to squirt out of the little sippy hole, all over his face. Suddenly the Sal Soul Orchestra is a bit too loud in his ears, he can't see out of his glasses and the fierce(ish) facade crumbles like a dried out scone. he laments not grabbing his customary handful of napkins and shuffles into the building. the people with whom he shares the elevator pretend not to notice the foam dripping off his ears and chin.
the only upside is that it was only the foam which squirted out and not the actual latte...which would've been a horrible waste of coffee (and seven dollars).
Monday, December 22, 2008
Three Days till Christmas/Weekend Re-Cap
and i'm so excited i can't even stand it!
It was cold and snowy all Friday night so we hunkered down with christmas cookies and a frozen lasagna and watched the Closer and my new prime-time soap obsession, Footballer's Wives .
.
Saturday was a day of "supposed to's". First, i was supposed to volunteer with my company's GLBT group to pack "blizzard boxes" at The Center for local AIDS/HIV+, homebound people, but was guilted into backing out so i could take my mom to finish her Christmas shopping. When i called her in the morning she bailed out on account of the snow & ice. So, i called Squirt and hit the mall with her; hjinx ensued (all i can say is that i wish i had an uncle with whom i could belt out Mariah's All i Want For Christmas, lemme tellya). we shopped, we lunched, we laughed. i love that kid and it's great to see her growing up into such a cute young woman (she's 12 going on 30 and has finally discovered make-up and perfume). After i dropped her off, i went home and watched Christmas Eve on Sesame Street which was my favorite Christmas special when i was a kid. it still made me all weepy (especially the Gift of the Magi scene with Ernie and Bert). Stephen rolled his eyes, patted my hand and retired to the kitchen to make a crumb cake to bring to my friend Paul's house later that evening. There, we hung out, caught up (his boyfriend had been planning a trip to Haiti for Halloween and we'd not seen him since) and ate the worst pizza i've ever had (i've still got agita), and played Wii (Brain Age Academy and Mario Party 8). a good time was had by all, much laughing and fun.
.
Sunday was spent, largely, in my pajamas. i spend 90% of the day wrapping the last of my gifts and watching Buffy (Stephen: "Screw Twilight. Buffy and Angel are the greatest vampire love story, ever") while Stephen did...something (i've honestly got no idea, that's how absorbed i was in wrapping). later on we went food shopping, which we'd not done in about 3 weeks and i subtly engineered giving him another* one of his gifts** a few days early. afterward, we got back into our pj's, he wrapped his gifts (cleverly concealed in Amazon.com boxes) and we continued our Buffy-thon; all in the warm glow of the Christmas tree.
.
now it's pretty early here, there's not alot of people about; it's colder than GW's heart outside, but wonderfully crisp and bright. i love this time of year!
.
* i had ordered him a fresh sourdough sread "starter" from King Arthur's Flour a few weeks ago. i called their Customer Service center and requested the delivery be delayed so that the starter would arrive this week and the rep said "no problem". sadly the damn thing arrived 2 days after i ordred it, so he's been making sourdough bread for the last 2 weeks.
.
**he's been talking about making Panettone for years but could never find the "pans" (oversized cupcake wrappers). i saw them on the King Arthur's website, and picked them up for him a few weeks ago. since he's off all week he figured it'd be a good opportunity to try out his recipe, even though he didn't have the pans. while shopping, he put some of the ingredients we didn't already have (candied citrus peel, golden raisins) in the cart and then took them out again. i put them back and gave him the pans when we got home.
Friday, December 19, 2008
Test Day: This Christmas
| Your Christmas is Modern |
 For you, Christmas is secular holiday. Religion doesn't play a big part in it. You are patient when it comes to Christmas. You don't celebrate too early, and you don't like seeing holiday decorations in October. You like Christmas traditions, but you're not uptight about them. You do things your way. You have some preferred ways of celebrating Christmas, but you're open to compromise. You enjoy Christmas more than anyone you know. Some might call it an obsession! You like giving to your friends and family during Christmas. You focus on the people you're close to. |
Test Day: Wrapped Up
| You Are Peaceful and Appreciative |
 You realize the holidays can be a hard time for some people, and you're there to lend your support. Not only do you enjoy giving during the holidays, you enjoy receiving greetings, love, and gifts. You graciously appreciate every holiday gesture made in your honor. Of all the types, you are the most likely to give a gift that's meaningful for you and the recipient. You're also the most likely to hand deliver as many of your gifts as possible. |
"Bah humbug/well that's too strong/it is my favorite holiday"~ Christmas Wrapping (the Waitresses)
Test Day: **PHEW**
| Your Christmas Stocking Will Be Filled With Little Wrapped Presents |
 Don't worry - what happens at the North Pole stays at the North Pole! |
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
Conversation of the Day
we join a business phone call, somewhere in the middle, after the usual exchange of pleasantries.
San Francisco Sales Assistant: ...please excuse the (classical) music in the background. that's my son...i'm working from home today.
CawfeeGuy: oh ok...lucky you.
SFSA: yeah, but this Baby Einstein tape is killing me.
CG: yeah, i'd imagine.
work discussion continues till SFSA unexpectedly shouts
SFSA (to son): no! put that down....DOWN!
CG laughs
SFSA (to CG): i'm very sorry about that.
CG (chuckles): it's fine...really.
SFSA: how old are you? are you married? do you have kids?
CG: 32...yes...no kids.
SFSA: oh...don't worry you've still got time, they'll come.
CG: um...i doubt it. my husband and i discussed it and decided on a Yorkie instead.
SFSA (laughs heartily): that was a great decision....very sound.
CG: that's what we thought.
SFSA: i gotta tellya though...you've got the best form of birth control!
San Francisco Sales Assistant: ...please excuse the (classical) music in the background. that's my son...i'm working from home today.
CawfeeGuy: oh ok...lucky you.
SFSA: yeah, but this Baby Einstein tape is killing me.
CG: yeah, i'd imagine.
work discussion continues till SFSA unexpectedly shouts
SFSA (to son): no! put that down....DOWN!
CG laughs
SFSA (to CG): i'm very sorry about that.
CG (chuckles): it's fine...really.
SFSA: how old are you? are you married? do you have kids?
CG: 32...yes...no kids.
SFSA: oh...don't worry you've still got time, they'll come.
CG: um...i doubt it. my husband and i discussed it and decided on a Yorkie instead.
SFSA (laughs heartily): that was a great decision....very sound.
CG: that's what we thought.
SFSA: i gotta tellya though...you've got the best form of birth control!
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
I Have the Power
either i'm incredibly influential or i know alot of sheep.Case #1
A co-worker purchased a comforter set for her mom, at Macy's, while on her lunch break. she gushes for ten minutes about how she walked into the linens department and fell in love with it on sight and how a different co-worker (with whom she had gone shopping) also liked it and wanted to buy it but it was the last one in the right size. finally she shows it to me and asks what i think. i tell her i don't like it...in my opinion it looks like something an old lady would have on her bed or something you'd find in a hotel. Half an hour later, she was returning it to the store.
Case #2A different co-worker had loaned me the 2nd book in the Twilight series (New Moon?) and when she came by this morning i gave it back to her. She was surprised, as i had it for less than a week. i told her i couldn't get past the 1st 100 pages. again she was surprised and said that she probably wouldn't read it when she finished the 1st book even though she was a) almost done and b) thoroughly enjoying it. when i asked her why, she said that if i didn't like it she wouldn't waste her time on it...even though she enjoyed the 1st book and i didn't.
imagine what i could do if i really put my mind to it.
Conversation of the Day
K---y: these lemon drops are really really good! can you give me the recipe?CawfeeGuy: sure...it's pretty big though, you may wanna cut it in half.
K: what do you mean?
CG: i mean it makes alot of cookies.
K: Oh...but what's in them?
CG: 8 cups of flour and a cup of Crisco...
K: Crisco? what's that?
CG: huh?
K: what's Crisco?
CG: vegetable shortening.
K: like oil?
CG: no...shortening...it's (kinda) solid.
K: never heard of it.
Monday, December 15, 2008
Dog Toys + Celebrities = Fabulous
besides, Mr Rufus already has a new toy that he's very happy with.
Sunday, December 14, 2008
Saturday, December 13, 2008
Thursday, December 11, 2008
Home Sweet Homo
i'll be home Friday, bakin' cookies, and therefore not blogging (or checking your blogs, every 15 minutes). if anything groundbreaking happens, text me.
_______ Best Non-Traditional Christmas Songs Pt 2
14. It Doesn't Often Snow at Christmas (the Pet Shop Boys): Christmas + the PSB = fabulous. it's worth a listen just to hear Neil Tennant keep repeating "Bing Crosby" over and over again.15. Spotlight on Christmas (Rufus Wainwright): god, i love this man's voice...i know i know he sometimes sounds whiny and prepubescent, but he's truly quite gifted...honest...
16. 2000 Miles: i actually have two different versions of this song, the original by the Pretenders and a cover by KT Tunstall which sounds just like the original.
17. December Will Be Magic Again (Kate Bush): she's like Sarah Brightman with a brain and a personality. this song is another "winter anthem", not Christmas specific, but it's alot of fun nonetheless.
18. Fairytale of New York: again...a winter anthem, but alot of fun. i've got two versions of this one, too; the original by the Pogues & Kristy MacColl and another cover by KT Tunstall (which is more PC 'cuz she changed the word faggot).
19. Lonley This Christmas (KT Tunstall): this kid's got such a sweet and interesting voice; it really works well with the sad and poingant Blue Christmas-esque lyrics.
20. Calling It Christmas (Joss Stone & Elton John): it hit me last night on the bus that i have a thing for pretty blonde white girls who sound like big black divas (read: Anastacia, Joss Stone, Natasha Bedingfield, Lisa Stansfield, and Taylor Dayne). this song is wonderfully rich and beautiful, Joss and Auntie Elton melding together wonderfully.
21. Another Lonely Christmas (Prince): it sounds like every other Prince song but with allusions to Christmas.
22. Thank God It's Christmas (Queen): fantastic song! very Freddy Mercury; very Queen. very fabulous
23. Let's Be Naughty and Save Santa the Trip (Elliot Yamin): he's got such a great voice; like a richer Stevie Wonder. this song is all sorts of jazz/vocally and cute.
24. The Little Match Seller/Silent Night (the Puppini Sisters): even though it's sung to the tune of Silent Night this fits the bill; it's sweet and sad and beautiful thanks to their gorgeous voices.
25. Jesus What a Wonderful Child (Mariah Carey): sweet merciful crap, but i love everything about Mariah's Merry Christmas cd and this is one of the best song on it. why? 'cuz Mz Carey LOSES HER SHIT at the end in true gospel style!
26. Christmas Conga (Cyndi Lauper): by far, one of my favorite christmas songs, ever. this whole cd (Merry Christmas and Have a Nice Life) is chock full of new and different Christmas songs (Home on Christmas Day, Early Christmas Morning, It Feels Like Christmas, Minnie and Santa and December Child) and a couple of covers (like a polka version of Rockin Around the Christmas Tree).
27. My Only Wish (Britney Spears): it's "cute and perky Britney" (as opposed to "crazy trailer trash Britney") and really cute.
28. I'll Be Home With Bells On: i've got two distinctly different versions of this gem. the 1st is the original by Dolly Parton and Kenny Rogers; it's cute and country and ridiculously Dolly! the other is RuPaul and Michelle Visage which is so stupidly gay and campy that it's worth the $3 you'll spend on the album, Ho Ho Ho.
29. Breath of Heaven/Mary's Song (Jessica Simpson): the rest of this CD is fluffy and kind of annoying (her cover of Baby It's Cold Outside makes me wanna punch her in the throat) but this song stands out with it's intertesting lyrics, wonderful arrangement and kick ass vocals. it really showcases J-Simp's pipes.
30. It's Christmas Time Again (Jessica Simpson): the other good song on the cd, but only because listening to her sing it you'd think her name was I Can't Believe It's Not Britney.
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
_______ Best Non-Traditional Christmas Songs
Let's face it, how many times can you hear White Christmas, Jingle Bells and Frosty the Snowman? I mean even non-traditional versions of the same songs (ie. Linda Eder's bombastically fabulous version of O Holy Night and Cyndi Lauper's trippy spaced out version of Silent Night) are still the same old songs...and a totally separate list that i can spin into a blog posting.Here's a fairly short list of music i've picked up in my many, many, years which is Christmasy without being tired....
(in no particular order other than how they pop up on my iPod, throughout the day)
1. a Lovely Way to Spend Christmas (Kristen Chenoweth): from the album of the same name.
2. All I Want for Christmas (Joss Stone): not that All I Want for Christmas that Mariah rocked out on...this one is sultry and smooth and with completely different lyrics.
3. Baby It's Cold Outside: now i dunno if people would consider this a Christmas song, but it's on several different Christmas CD's 'cuz the song's about...well...the cold. either way, it's makes a nice change from real christmas songs. the best version, by far, is by Liza Minelli & Alan Cumming and is from the Broadway Cares: Home for Christmas cd. She's slurring all over the place, he's all sexy and Scottish (or is it welsh?). They banter and sing...it's fabulous.
4. Mary Did You Know: i've got a couple of different versions of this; one by Kimberly Locke, which is slow and very thoughtful...almost somber. The other is by the incomparable Kristine W and is more up. both are great songs.
5. It's Christmas and Christmas Carol (the Oakridge Boys): my mom had Christmas with the Oakridge Boys on vinyl when i was a kid and used to play it over and over again while we made Christmas cookies and decorated the tree; these two songs were always my favorite.
6. Christmas Caravan* (the Squirrel Nut Zippers): totally different and new christmas music (except for a fantastic Southern Jazz Band rendition of Sleigh Ride).
7. the Christmas Song (the Ravonettes): not, Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire, mind you. the Ravonettes have a rock/retro-girl group kinda sound...with a male vocalist...very interesting.
8. the Bells of St. Pauls (Linda Eder): while the rest of her Christmas CD (Christmas Stays the Same) is an exercise in fabulous covers and alternate versions of traditional holiday music, this song stands alone as an anthemic ballad that calls to mind (at least to John and myself) a video shot, on location, in London featuring Linda in swirling snow, pigeons and a huge mink coat...running throughout the town and ending up in the bell tower like Quasimodo. i defy you to listen to it and not get chills.
9. Gonna Eat for Christmas (Rosie O'Donnell & Gloria Estefan): the title says it all...'cuz that's what this holiday is all about! Love Ro & Glo!
10. She Won't Be Home for Christmas (Erasure): this song is so sweet and so sad and, like most Erasure songs, doesn't make a whole lot of sense...
11. Aye Aye Aye It's Christmas (Ricky Martin): can you think of anything better than Ricky Martin in a big red bow? it's a great alternative to the terribly repetitive Feliz Navidad...
12. Merry Christmas (Bette Midler): Cool Yule is my absolute, favorite, christmas cd and this is song is wonderfully sentimental and sweet.
13. I've Got My Love to Keep Me Warm: another song that's not so much "christmas" as "winter anthem" (see #3), i've got a couple of versions of this song but the best are Doris Day and Billie Holliday; quite frankly, Doris sounds like she's about to get fucked-but-good in a sleigh and Billie is just Billie.
"It's hard to get sick of christmas music since none of the music you've been playing sounds like Christmas music"~ Stephen
Tuesday, December 09, 2008
Color Me a Hypocrite
due to the fact that our department is understaffed by, about, 5 people*, i have no choice but to come to work tomorrow. on one hand i'm incredibly ashamed by my inability to be that guy; the guy who is willing to risk it for his principles or is able to muster the smallest amount of courage in the name of civil disobedience. my work ethic and sense of "responsibility" to my job** preclude all those feelings, i'm afraid. on the other hand, i live in a state that recognizes our recent canadian nuptials and work for a company that stresses tolerance and recognizes Stephen as my spouse.
So much for being part of a movement.
i'm sorry, all.
*i'm actually alone today as neither K---y nor Cunty are in today, the former having requested the day off last week and the latter deciding last night at 4pm that she wasn't coming in.
**K---y is scheduled to be off tomorrow and if i called out, that would leave Cunty alone.
So much for being part of a movement.
i'm sorry, all.
*i'm actually alone today as neither K---y nor Cunty are in today, the former having requested the day off last week and the latter deciding last night at 4pm that she wasn't coming in.
**K---y is scheduled to be off tomorrow and if i called out, that would leave Cunty alone.
Monday, December 08, 2008
Christmas Checklist
1.Cards
write outaddressmail
2. Tree
haul outdecorate
3. Cookies
- make dough (Italian 7 Layer, Italian Lemon Drops, Snickerdoodles, Cream Cheese Tasties, Eggnog Spritz, & Brown Sugar Cut-Outs) and refrigerate.
- Bake
4. Gifts (purchase)
StephenRufusMomDadBrother & Sister-in-LawSquirtFrangelicaJohn&JustinBri-the-Pie Guy- Jenn
BenMS& DugChewieCunty (Kris Kringle)
5. Gifts wrapped
Friday, December 05, 2008
That's Not a Popper...
i'm trying my damndest to think of somebody i can buy this for.
anybody....anyone at all...
Test Day: i Guess It's Better Than Coal...
| You Are a Losing Lottery Ticket! |
 But in the end, a cheap letdown. |
Thursday, December 04, 2008
Thursday Morning's Are Like...Something Really Bad*...
1. the puppy peed off the pad and all over the floor, at some point during the night.
2. i thought i forgot my metrocard, walked back home, searched feverishly and then found it in my pocket.
3. ran back to bus stop, to watch the tail lights in the distance 'cuz the bus was early. had to walk down to the other bus stop.
4. texting stephen made me feel even worse.
5. my phone is all screwed up; the auto text picks the most random words and strings of numbers. i'm gonna punt it soon.
6. the Man in the Box fucked up my coffee, again and of course i don't realize till i get up to my desk.
7. i'm back up to 189 lbs. yes, i managed to gain 5 lbs since Thanksgiving.
8. the house is a royal mess. halloween decorations are still sitting in a corner in our bedroom and i honestly have absolutely no desire, right now, to decorate for christmas beyond putting up the tree.
*i can't come up with a viable analogy...feel free to come up with your own. if it sounds good i'll add it in.
2. i thought i forgot my metrocard, walked back home, searched feverishly and then found it in my pocket.
3. ran back to bus stop, to watch the tail lights in the distance 'cuz the bus was early. had to walk down to the other bus stop.
4. texting stephen made me feel even worse.
5. my phone is all screwed up; the auto text picks the most random words and strings of numbers. i'm gonna punt it soon.
6. the Man in the Box fucked up my coffee, again and of course i don't realize till i get up to my desk.
7. i'm back up to 189 lbs. yes, i managed to gain 5 lbs since Thanksgiving.
8. the house is a royal mess. halloween decorations are still sitting in a corner in our bedroom and i honestly have absolutely no desire, right now, to decorate for christmas beyond putting up the tree.
*i can't come up with a viable analogy...feel free to come up with your own. if it sounds good i'll add it in.
Wednesday, December 03, 2008
Christmas Is a Time to Say "You're Difficult and I Have No Idea What to Buy For You"
so to make it easy, i put a couple of things on my Amazon.com Wishlist, hoping Stephen and my mom would quit pestering me.
Wrong. Apparantly, my "wishes" are too small. i apologized for having everything i could need (hubby, puppy, friends and an iPod), but what can i do? i'm a man of simple tastes (read: the interests of a 10 year old boy).
Wrong. Apparantly, my "wishes" are too small. i apologized for having everything i could need (hubby, puppy, friends and an iPod), but what can i do? i'm a man of simple tastes (read: the interests of a 10 year old boy).
Monday, December 01, 2008
It's Begining to Sound Alot Like Christmas Pt 1
Here it is, the 1st of December, and i've had my iPod pumping out Christmas tunes for the last 3 days. in truth, though, i started hunting for new music back in October. anyway, thanks to iTunes Essentials and their Genius program here are the highlights of what i got...
1. Mr. Heatmiser (the Big Bad Voodoo Daddies): Christmas is all about covers and this one is three shades of fabulous since it's from Santa Claus is Coming to Town, which is one of the best of the Claymation Christmas specials.
2. Christmas Baby Please Come Home (Death Cab for Cutie): though not my favorite version of this song (that would be Cher's from Another Rosie Christmas), this one is pretty damn good; it's haunting and mellow and really sentimental.
3. Ole Santa & Silent Night (Dinah Washington): i totally love her voice and had no idea she had any Christmas music in her repertoire. She's so sultry and jazzy; think Eartha Kitt meets Shirley Bassey...
4. With Bells On & Hard Candy Christmas (Dolly Parton): now, lemme say, i'm totally not a fan of country music but there's just something about Dolly. i'd only heard these songs sung by, of all people, RuPaul on her Christmas album (Ho! Ho! Ho!), but the originals totally blow those away thanks to Dolly's plaintive warble and that retro-seventies sound.
5. My Kind of Holiday* (Elliot Yamin): he has got such a wonderfully soulful and rich voice that lends itself very well to Christmas music; his traditional covers are fantastic but his non-traditional stuff (Backdoor Santa, a Very Merry Christmas, Christmas Without Carol, Let's Be Naughty and Save Santa the Trip, Warm Me Up,) are even better. i highly recommend picking them up.
6. A Lovely Way to Spend Christmas* (Kristen Chenoweth): an all around good Christmas album which deserves a place on the shelf next to Andy Williams, Bing Crosby and Doris Day. Kristen has such a delightfully sweet voice which makes the transition from Broadway to holiday seamlessly. the only odd choice is Sing, which i only remember from Sesame Street and doesn't seem to have anything to do with Christmas and is one of those songs that gets stuck in your head for days.
7. O Holy Night (Illicit mix) (Kristine W): another remix of Kristine's version of O Holy Night; it's typical Illicit; dancey and funky and fun.
8. Silent Night (Lifehouse): a great pop/rock rendition.
9. a New Thought for Christmas* (Melissa Etheridge): Mel's fun. She's rocky and bluesy and gritty and raw and somehow it translates well into a christmas album. not my favorite but it does have some good tracks.
10. Merry Christmas to Everyone (Pink Noise radio edit) (More!): more christmas dance music; fun and a little trancey but not weird/spacey like those Verve remix and Chill-Out cd's.
11. Merry Merry Christmas* (the New Kids on the Block): it's terrible; absolutely awful and not worth the $7 i paid for it, but i love it. it's got all the flavor of '80's/90's pop Christmas music like Wham's Last Christmas and the entire Very Special Christmas cd.
12. Jingle Bells (the Puppini Sisters): Bri-the-Pie-Guy recommended them to me, like a hundred years ago and somehow i never got around to downloading anything by them till now. they're terrific! like the Andrew's Sisters but better! it's a shame there's only 2 songs on the single, but their version of Silent Night is just wonderful.
13. Coming Out at Christmas (the San Francisco's Gay Men's Chorus): hysterically fabulous a capella! a must have!
14. Santa Baby (Sheila E): i'm pretty sure i now own every version of this song, ever made...now i can die. Sheila E's cover is cute and latiny, though a bit long; still it's nice to hear somehthing by her other than the Glamorous Life.
15: the Twelve Days of Christmas (Straight no Chaser): Nil posted this video on her blog last year and i stumbled upon it on iTunes. very cute.
*album title
1. Mr. Heatmiser (the Big Bad Voodoo Daddies): Christmas is all about covers and this one is three shades of fabulous since it's from Santa Claus is Coming to Town, which is one of the best of the Claymation Christmas specials.
2. Christmas Baby Please Come Home (Death Cab for Cutie): though not my favorite version of this song (that would be Cher's from Another Rosie Christmas), this one is pretty damn good; it's haunting and mellow and really sentimental.
3. Ole Santa & Silent Night (Dinah Washington): i totally love her voice and had no idea she had any Christmas music in her repertoire. She's so sultry and jazzy; think Eartha Kitt meets Shirley Bassey...
4. With Bells On & Hard Candy Christmas (Dolly Parton): now, lemme say, i'm totally not a fan of country music but there's just something about Dolly. i'd only heard these songs sung by, of all people, RuPaul on her Christmas album (Ho! Ho! Ho!), but the originals totally blow those away thanks to Dolly's plaintive warble and that retro-seventies sound.
5. My Kind of Holiday* (Elliot Yamin): he has got such a wonderfully soulful and rich voice that lends itself very well to Christmas music; his traditional covers are fantastic but his non-traditional stuff (Backdoor Santa, a Very Merry Christmas, Christmas Without Carol, Let's Be Naughty and Save Santa the Trip, Warm Me Up,) are even better. i highly recommend picking them up.
6. A Lovely Way to Spend Christmas* (Kristen Chenoweth): an all around good Christmas album which deserves a place on the shelf next to Andy Williams, Bing Crosby and Doris Day. Kristen has such a delightfully sweet voice which makes the transition from Broadway to holiday seamlessly. the only odd choice is Sing, which i only remember from Sesame Street and doesn't seem to have anything to do with Christmas and is one of those songs that gets stuck in your head for days.
7. O Holy Night (Illicit mix) (Kristine W): another remix of Kristine's version of O Holy Night; it's typical Illicit; dancey and funky and fun.
8. Silent Night (Lifehouse): a great pop/rock rendition.
9. a New Thought for Christmas* (Melissa Etheridge): Mel's fun. She's rocky and bluesy and gritty and raw and somehow it translates well into a christmas album. not my favorite but it does have some good tracks.
10. Merry Christmas to Everyone (Pink Noise radio edit) (More!): more christmas dance music; fun and a little trancey but not weird/spacey like those Verve remix and Chill-Out cd's.
11. Merry Merry Christmas* (the New Kids on the Block): it's terrible; absolutely awful and not worth the $7 i paid for it, but i love it. it's got all the flavor of '80's/90's pop Christmas music like Wham's Last Christmas and the entire Very Special Christmas cd.
12. Jingle Bells (the Puppini Sisters): Bri-the-Pie-Guy recommended them to me, like a hundred years ago and somehow i never got around to downloading anything by them till now. they're terrific! like the Andrew's Sisters but better! it's a shame there's only 2 songs on the single, but their version of Silent Night is just wonderful.
13. Coming Out at Christmas (the San Francisco's Gay Men's Chorus): hysterically fabulous a capella! a must have!
14. Santa Baby (Sheila E): i'm pretty sure i now own every version of this song, ever made...now i can die. Sheila E's cover is cute and latiny, though a bit long; still it's nice to hear somehthing by her other than the Glamorous Life.
15: the Twelve Days of Christmas (Straight no Chaser): Nil posted this video on her blog last year and i stumbled upon it on iTunes. very cute.
*album title
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