Good Morning Jersey

i hate New Jersey, i really do. the way the people drive; how they dress, it's all incredibly irritating. it's like New York's inbred cousin. sadly, i'm stuck in the backward Garden stae for the next week. my company has been forced to establish an office for "Disaster Recovery": in case of another 9/11 we are to come here to East Wazoo, NJ (the only town in america without a STARBUCKS) to do our jobs. right. 'cause if NY gets attacked, my 1st thought is to drive over the Goethals Bridge (as if it would be an option), into deepest, greenest, biggest-hair-ville. sure. hold your breath for that. in case of another 9/11, the last thing i'll be thinking of is my job.
the office is amazingly cold (maybe it's the non-stop air conditioning in a room with 100 computer terminals, but only 7 people). i don't really know any of the other people i'm with, except for Snarky and the Tupperware lady. my computer is slower than Angela Landsbury making love, and my phone's buttons are all stuck so i can't really dial out. the only upshot is that i'm outta here every day at 4 and it only takes 45 minutes to get home.